When you are young and just beginning to grasp the great difficulties of life, you rarely stop to think about where it might take you. You keep repeating that one sentence to yourself 'I have time. I am still young.' It's true you can feel young at 65 and old at 25. I am one of those people that still believe it's all about the state of mind, not years gone by. So you carry on, without a care in the world keep on living and dreaming and not giving a damn. That's until someone reminds you of things that lay ahead. It may usually be a parent, a relative or a friend. The most annoying ones are the people that aren't really close to you and don't know anything about you, yet dare to plan your steps into a life they think is perfect for you.
The process usually starts with them asking questions about what you do, if you are studying or working, where, since when... You know, the usual. Then, they have the audacity to start telling you what you should do and where you should go it. The one thing that really ticks my horns is when others tell me that my clock is ticking and I should start focusing on things like getting a good steady job, place to live, finding a man and having a family of my own.
In those moments they may win for a very short time, making me doubt 'Am I missing out?' My rebel side gets over it fast though - the part of me that fuels my dreams and who I am. Maybe some people are just stuck in a time well ahead of their personal growth. First of all, where do you think you found the right to tell me how to live my life? Is your life so perfect that you feel like a wise man that has to bestow some of his/her wisdom on me? More importantly do you really think that I want a life as yours? That somehow all of us want the same things in life?
I have aspirations of a great career, of travels, of nights spent in great conversations with great friends, in sleepless nights worrying about important meetings. I don't have to, or shouldn't have to fit in the conservative mould of a mindset that wants a man that will love and worship her, steal her the moon and the stars, and eventually kneel and ask her to become his wife. So I can then plan a wedding that would take me years to pay off, put mine and his family in debt, and start popping children.
Given 7.7 billion people existing in the world, it's crazy to think that we are all after the same life. Just to be clear; this isn't against people that want a conventional life. This is against people that think all people do. Surprisingly, a huge portion of well-educated people think like that. The worst part is when they try to convince you that a fulfilling lifestyle only ''happens'' to people who are wealthy, exceptional, particularly talented.. But not me.
What if I tell you that what is important for you isn't or never even will be as important for me? What if I tell you that my path is not the same as my mother's or my grandmother's? I have the right and the option to choose for myself, make my own path and want to believe in myself - I am exceptional, talented and own a wealth of thinking different. And I feel proud of all of these. I also think a fulfilling lifestyle does not just happen either; those we admire living in that lifestyle work for it, every day, for years. Success does not happen over night contrary to those who believe only lottery can bring a fulfilling lifestyle. You have been taught wrong, my dear.
All in all it is up to you to decide. Anytime you hear someone telling what you should and shouldn't do; just remember that you are the one living with all those choices. You are the only one that will walk down your path and you should be technically and emotionally its maker. Others submit their opinions, then walk away. If not making it happen, you could only get lost while benchmarking yourself to a life designed by somebody else on your behalf. So stop letting them in.
In such cases, you have only two possible actions. You can listen, smile politely and then do whatever you want in your life. Or do as I do (I am a bit of a hothead), turn around and walk out of such conversations. After all you wouldn't want to hold a grudge on someone just because you listened to his/her words. And let's face it, we forgive ourselves a lot faster than we do others.
By Katerina Dimitrioska - Editor at She Is Rebel